I gave someone my phone number. But he didn't call. I basically said to another that we should go to see the same film. But he wanted to see another. Either they don't get it, or they are showing they are not interested by playing dumb (especially in the latter case).

I listen to Nerina Pallot more and more. Some of the early tracks on the album i really relate to.
posted by small kat at 5:04 PM

Sometimes i really see how little i understand people. Maybe i am immature, but even i don't ask other people to spy for me. What i really don't understand is why they want me to spy when they aren't interested.

Am i doing things wrong?
posted by small kat at 5:34 PM

I had a busy Saturday. In the morning i dropped off a couple of books at the library, and got out a few more (a tamora pierce and "an old fashioned girl" by alcott). I rushed into Sutton and put in a fair bit of money into my savings account. It is so depressing, maybe i really do need 20k before i can buy by own place? If that is the case i am looking at nearly 2.5 years. Although i feel certain that i could get something around 60k which would mean "only" another 5k to save. That i think i could do in around 10 months. Which seems a more reasonable idea. As well as my privacy, i also want to feel secure in case we lose the house. Of course, this doesn't help mum, but if i had my own place at least there would be somewhere for her to store her "stuff". It feels very selfish thinking about these sorts of things, but i can't be responsible for my parent just yet.

Saturday afternoon i went for a Spice easy ramble. Nearly killed me. Practically everyone else came on walks regularly and was a lot quicker. I just couldn't take the pace, and was extremely tired by the end of it. Today my feet hurt, but i didn't feel stiff, which i think means that it was the pace rather than the length which got to me.

In the evening i went to Zorbas, where the food was nice (i'm not that keen on greek food really), the place was crowded and no-one asked me to dance. Not that it really mattered, i wasn't in the mood for dancing in cramped conditions.
posted by small kat at 5:26 PM

My back started hurting, i was depressed. I got very ratty and probably pissed a few people off. But i got some painkillers for my back, and tried to get my appointment with a CPN moved forward. At the last one, the psych asked me if it was cyclical. Something to do with my periods. I didn't think so.

But now i'm not so sure. What if the past 5 years or so have been as the result of being on the pill? I don't know. I'll discuss it when i finally get an appointment.

I went on the murder mystery weekend last weekend. I have been waiting so long, but it was very surreal laughing about death with all that had gone before. But we were determined to enjoy ourselves and carry on. I didn't guess the identity of both murderers, ut i had a lot of fun talking to people and trying to suss it all out. It did get a bit much for me by Sunday lunchtime, and i had to leave and just get my head together. But i am slowly building up the amount of time i spend with other people.

I spent some time with Gary, who is a very interesting person. And if one more person makes some comment about us i will scream! He's a nice guy (god how i loathe that phrase), but not really my type. Do i really have a type? No... i don't know.

I won Leona Naess' cd on ebay. I'm quite looking forward to giving it a listen. For every sale that i lose money on (ie most of them) i find things that i would like at cheap prices, so everything goes and comes around. I've sold some my books that i don't read, and only ever read once (Modesitt i'm looking in your direction). It clears out space in my room and book shelves. Space for more...oops!

I've been looking again at buying my own place, it looks like i might have to save another 15k before i can get anything i really like. 15k! It's a frightening amount of money. I can do it, but it'll take time. And i wanted to move out in the near future. I'm probably looking at 2003 before i can do that, which is even more frightening. I'll be 27 then, how sad is that that i cannot afford to buy my own place until then. I guess i really have been messing around the last couple of years, i could have saved a lot more money. Well, i did really i just spent it on luxuries like a car! And thinking about it, a car is important.

I could get somewhere for the mortgage and 10% deposit i have right now, but it wouldn't be in a "nice" area. Ok so i don't have to worry about what the schools are like, i just want a roof over my head, but i want to feel safe too. A single girl has to think about these things.

Maybe i could go on Millionaire and win a bit? I wouldn't need to cheat, either.
posted by small kat at 4:20 PM